Derek Zoolander said, “Water is the essence of moisture.” The 10 keys discussed below are the essence of how to get Healthy as F%$#!
These are the most fundamental points. I will discuss each one in length elsewhere on the site. This isn’t the why. This isn’t the how. This isn’t the who. You are the who. This is the 10,000 foot view of what are the most important things for your health.
1. Eat lots of fats. Fats are the best fuel your body can use. Fats will keep you full, keep your blood sugar low, taste good in your mouth, and help you look and feel your best. Eat more fats, and then eat some more. If you want ten good reasons why, click here: Top Ten Reasons to Eat More Fat
2. Eat lots of vegetables. They are full of micronutrients, low in calories, and high in fiber. Vegetables are healthy as F%$#! Here is why… Top Ten Reasons to eat More Veggies
3. Don’t eat sugar. Don’t eat fake sugar, high fructose corn syrup, grains, whole grains, or starches. These foods create blood sugar spikes, insulin release, inflammation, obesity, and diabetes. For more information on this, here you go. Cut the BS*!
4. Take breaks from eating. Doing a long fast every couple of weeks or daily time restricted eating has many health benefits and can help regulate blood sugar, lower cancer risk, and lower inflammation. The “No Food Diet” or an idiot’s guide for easy fasting
5. Don’t eat processed foods. These foods are loaded in anti-nutrients, chemicals, and toxic mass-produced grains, sugar, and soy. Here’s my processed foods manifesto. The Processed Foods Manifesto (with memes)
6. Eat protein, but not too much. Protein helps us maintain our muscle and other body structures, but too much can elevate your cancer risk and cause weight gain.
7. Exercise regularly but not to lose weight. Exercise is amazing for your body but don’t try and out-exercise a shitty diet. Working out is most effective when it’s done using weights and with short periods of intense unpleasant activity. * The Stoops easy, no jogging, workout plan
9. Stop reading labels, counting calories, and food measuring. Start buying, cooking, and eating real whole food, and eat until you are comfortably full, using the above rules as a guide. My guide to eating your top ten favorite foods is coming soon.
10. Don’t try to eat perfectly all the time. Follow the 80/20 rule that states, what you do 80% of the time is what really counts. So, have some pizza, tacos, wine, and tequila every now and then. Here’s your cheat day guide. F*** Moderation. How to overdo it.
*Stop jogging. Consult your doctor before starting an exercise program, but don’t tell him or her about the above rules, as they will likely disagree.